What we Do Without Real Love: Imitation Love

If we don’t have enough Real Love in our lives, the resulting emptiness is unbearable. We then compulsively try to fill our emptiness with whatever feels good in the moment—money, anger, sex, alcohol, drugs, violence, power, and the conditional approval of others. Anything we use as a substitute for Real Love becomes a form of Imitation Love, and although Imitation Love feels good for a moment, it never lasts and never gives us the feeling of genuine happiness that Real Love provides.

Uploaded by mikebaer77 on Oct 24, 2006

Dr. Greg Baer, a nationally recognized relationship expert gives an overview of the basic principles of Real Love---the one thing that guarantees happiness in life and relationships. Learn more at: http://www.reallove.com

Most people spend their entire lives trying to fill their emptiness with Imitation Love, but all they achieve is an ever-deepening frustration, punctuated by brief moments of superficial satisfaction. All the unhappiness in our lives is due to that lack of Real Love and to the frustration we experience as we desperately and hopelessly try to create happiness from a flawed foundation of Imitation Love. The beauty of Real Love is that it ALWAYS will eliminate our anger, confusion, and pain. So how do we find this universal cure?

Finding Real Love

As people learn the principles of Real Love, they almost uniformly ask how they can find and feel the real thing. They want to feel the actual power of Real Love.
Fortunately, there are so many courses of action we can take to find Real Love and experience its healing power.

1. Study. Read the book Real Love. Watch the Essentials of Real Love online or on the six-DVD set. The more we study these true, lifegiving principles, the more we tend to feel the power that emanates from them.

2. Participate in the forums offered here on RealLove.com. There you can tell the truth about yourself and feel the acceptance from those who can see, accept and love you.

3. Hire a Real Love Coach. Many people have found the guidance of a professional coach indispensable as they learn and apply the principles of Real Love. You can learn more about coaching at RealLoveCoaching.net.

4. Join a Real Love Group. If one is not available, take the steps to form one. Share the Real Love book or the Essentials DVDs with friends, and as you do that, you will naturally find people who express an interest in the principles of Real Love. Gradually, you can ask these people if they have an interest in joining you in a Real Love study group.

5. Gradually accumulate a group of people that you can communicate with by phone or in person every day. Make a habit of communicating with at least one person every day who is capable of loving you unconditionally. You will find these people as you take the steps described above.

6. Attend the Real Love seminars you find listed on the website under Events and Seminars .
As you take these steps, and tell the truth about yourself to other people—especially about your mistakes, flaws, and fears—they can finally see you as you really are. They can accept you and give you unconditional love, as indicated in this simple diagram:

Truth

Seen

Accepted

Loved

When you feel enough of the unconditional love of others, you'll have the most important treasure in life. The wounds of the past will heal—wounds caused by insufficient Real Love—and you'll feel whole and happy. As your emptiness and fear are eliminated by Real Love, you'll simply have no need to use Getting and Protecting Behaviors. Without those behaviors, you'll find relationships with others relatively effortless and will begin finding the happiness you've always wanted.

We have now seen the powerfully healing effects of Real Love in the lives of tens of thousands of individuals. Impossibly unhappy marriages now thrive, angry and rebellious children now turn to their parents for love and guidance, singles are finding partners interested in a relationship based on Real Love instead of trading in the sure disappointment of Imitation Love, and divisive and unproductive corporate cultures are become nurturing and supportive. Visit RealLove.com daily to get the relationship advice and tools that will help you replace your anger, confusion and addictions with peace, confidence, and happiness.

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