11/22/2011

PEPPER SPRAYING COP

“Even if there is only one possible unified theory, it is just a set of rules and equations. What is it that breathes fire into the equations and makes a universe for them to describe? The usual approach of science of constructing a mathematical model cannot answer the questions of why there should be a univAAAUAAAAGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!”
“Even if there is only one possible unified theory, it is just a set of rules and equations. What is it that breathes fire into the equations and makes a universe for them to describe? The usual approach of science of constructing a mathematical model cannot answer the questions of why there should be a univAAAUAAAAGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!”
“This is gonna be the greatest thing ever. People are gonna read all kinds of horse shit into this photo and you know what? We’re just going to laugh and laugh and laugh. ‘Oh why is Paul out of his shoes? Why is George in blue jeans? Why is John in white? Why is that bug halfway up the curb? Fucking idiots. People are so dumbAUUAHAGAHAUAGHAGAHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“This is gonna be the greatest thing ever. People are gonna read all kinds of horse shit into this photo and you know what? We’re just going to laugh and laugh and laugh. ‘Oh why is Paul out of his shoes? Why is George in blue jeans? Why is John in white? Why is that bug halfway up the curb? Fucking idiots. People are so dumbAUUAHAGAHAUAGHAGAHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“OK let’s get some sap green on our two inch brush. Load it up nice and full. Now just give it a little dab into the alizarin crimson and start working it into our little meadow here. Nice and soft, nice and easy. Just start making a little meadow. A happy little place where you might want to sit down with your friendsAAUUAUUAHAHAUUGHGHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“OK let’s get some sap green on our two inch brush. Load it up nice and full. Now just give it a little dab into the alizarin crimson and start working it into our little meadow here. Nice and soft, nice and easy. Just start making a little meadow. A happy little place where you might want to sit down with your friendsAAUUAUUAHAHAUUGHGHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“Here at the University Of Austria we like to have beautiful musical times whilst sitting in the park! Sing along, everybody, and let us rejoice in the wonder of some traditional folk songsAUAUAUHAGAHAGAHAGAHHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“Here at the University Of Austria we like to have beautiful musical times whilst sitting in the park! Sing along, everybody, and let us rejoice in the wonder of some traditional folk songsAUAUAUHAGAHAGAHAGAHHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“Where the fuck did this Christmas tree ornament come from? I haven’t recognized the holiday since I was a wee child. Wait, who’s reflection is that? Is that Father Christmas come to pay me a visitAAUAUAUUAGAHAGAGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“Where the fuck did this Christmas tree ornament come from? I haven’t recognized the holiday since I was a wee child. Wait, who’s reflection is that? Is that Father Christmas come to pay me a visitAAUAUAUUAGAHAGAGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“Finally I get to go outside! Thank god they were able to fashion this plastic bubble suit for me. It almost feels like I’m in a tent. Yep, just walking around in a tent in the park. This rules! Oh, you’re spraying me with something? Cool.”
“Finally I get to go outside! Thank god they were able to fashion this plastic bubble suit for me. It almost feels like I’m in a tent. Yep, just walking around in a tent in the park. This rules! Oh, you’re spraying me with something? Cool.”
“The chances of me being a victim of police brutality here are so low from a statistical standpoint. There are so many people in this park right now, and I am so blended in that singling me out for a beating or pepper spray would be completely improbableAUUAUHAHGAHAGHAGAHAGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“The chances of me being a victim of police brutality here are so low from a statistical standpoint. There are so many people in this park right now, and I am so blended in that singling me out for a beating or pepper spray would be completely improbableAUUAUHAHGAHAGHAGAHAGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“OK OK!! I am CERTAINLY not yielding. But let’s think this through. I have it on pretty good authority from the Necromancer that if we continue, there will be literally MILLIONS of insufferably annoying white assholes who are going to take every word that comes out of both of our mouths and repeat them ad nauseam at EVERY POSSIBLE OPPORTUNITY. Forever. Until the end of time. I propose that we think about all the classmates, roommates, workmates, girlfriends, wives and all others within ear shot of these people and just stop now and maybe go get a nice quiet lunchAUAUUAHUAHAGHAGAHAGHGHGHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“OK OK!! I am CERTAINLY not yielding. But let’s think this through. I have it on pretty good authority from the Necromancer that if we continue, there will be literally MILLIONS of insufferably annoying white assholes who are going to take every word that comes out of both of our mouths and repeat them ad nauseam at EVERY POSSIBLE OPPORTUNITY. Forever. Until the end of time. I propose that we think about all the classmates, roommates, workmates, girlfriends, wives and all others within ear shot of these people and just stop now and maybe go get a nice quiet lunchAUAUUAHUAHAGHAGAHAGHGHGHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“Its such a great thing, this park. It bringing me back to all my brothers in arms who fell. Now that I have finally recovered from the Agent Orange spraying I can seeAUAUUAUAYUAHHAHAGGAGGAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“Its such a great thing, this park. It bringing me back to all my brothers in arms who fell. Now that I have finally recovered from the Agent Orange spraying I can seeAUAUUAUAYUAHHAHAGGAGGAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“Mic check! I want to say that this experience, occupying the Fraggle Rock, has been so amazing on every level. How we can peacefully come together with a unified voice and be happy and harmonious while sending a message to that weird old guy upstairs, its just.. its just great. Even those weird ass little Doozers are coming around and don’t seem as grumpy as usualAAUAUAUAGAGHHAGAGAHAHAGAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“Mic check! I want to say that this experience, occupying the Fraggle Rock, has been so amazing on every level. How we can peacefully come together with a unified voice and be happy and harmonious while sending a message to that weird old guy upstairs, its just.. its just great. Even those weird ass little Doozers are coming around and don’t seem as grumpy as usualAAUAUAUAGAGHHAGAGAHAHAGAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“Phew! I am so glad we changed the mind of that grouchy guy who was indiscriminately pissing on our parade! Now we can have our gathering without fear of some random jerkAAUAUUAHAHASHSGAHAGAGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“Phew! I am so glad we changed the mind of that grouchy guy who was indiscriminately pissing on our parade! Now we can have our gathering without fear of some random jerkAAUAUUAHAHASHSGAHAGAGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“I asked them all to think of a better name for the album, but they just had to keep pressing. Fuck. I can’t let them know the real secret behind my opposition of this name. Thank god none of my old mates from Liverpool haven’t went public about my terrible nickname of “Pepperdick Johnny.” I can’t help it! Its a medical conditionAAUUAUAAGAGAIAAGAGAGAGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“I asked them all to think of a better name for the album, but they just had to keep pressing. Fuck. I can’t let them know the real secret behind my opposition of this name. Thank god none of my old mates from Liverpool haven’t went public about my terrible nickname of “Pepperdick Johnny.” I can’t help it! Its a medical conditionAAUUAUAAGAGAIAAGAGAGAGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“Whaddya say, Rose? Shouldn’t we run away to the West Coast once we land in America? I hear they have beautiful meadows and public parks washed in warm sun and crisp fresh air where you can sit and sit and sit, and no annoying stereotypical Italian cliches like my pal Enrico or Salvatore or whatever the fuck his name isAUUUAHAHUAHAUAHAHGHGHGHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“Whaddya say, Rose? Shouldn’t we run away to the West Coast once we land in America? I hear they have beautiful meadows and public parks washed in warm sun and crisp fresh air where you can sit and sit and sit, and no annoying stereotypical Italian cliches like my pal Enrico or Salvatore or whatever the fuck his name isAUUUAHAHUAHAUAHAHGHGHGHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“Thank you lord Jesus for taking time out of your busy day to allow me to throw a football around and run around on grass and have super loads of fun. I know for a fact that every time I throw the football real good its because you are personally behind it. I am just that special. Its OK, you can admit it. Now just let me get down on this grass for a bit longer while IAUUAHAUAUUAHAGAGAHAGAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“Thank you lord Jesus for taking time out of your busy day to allow me to throw a football around and run around on grass and have super loads of fun. I know for a fact that every time I throw the football real good its because you are personally behind it. I am just that special. Its OK, you can admit it. Now just let me get down on this grass for a bit longer while IAUUAHAUAUUAHAGAGAHAGAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“Mom, can you really just stop having me drink sea water out of those gross shells? You know that those things are full of sand and little crabs and stuff, right? You HAVE dranken out of them before? Yes, I said “dranken”. Do something about it. What, you gonna correct me? You’re the one having an unabashed tide pool orgyAAUUAUAGGHAGHAGAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“Mom, can you really just stop having me drink sea water out of those gross shells? You know that those things are full of sand and little crabs and stuff, right? You HAVE dranken out of them before? Yes, I said “dranken”. Do something about it. What, you gonna correct me? You’re the one having an unabashed tide pool orgyAAUUAUAGGHAGHAGAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”



“AAAAUAUAUGHGHGHGGHGHGHGHHGHGHHHGHG….. AASAAUAUAUUAUAUAUUGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“AAAAUAUAUGHGHGHGGHGHGHGHHGHGHHHGHG….. AASAAUAUAUUAUAUAUUGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“Why why why why why why did I leave these fucking dog treats in my pocket on the way to the civil disobedience? As if I am not up shits creek enough living in fucking ALABAMA in this day and ageAAAUAUAUUAAAAGGGGHHHHHHH”
“Why why why why why why did I leave these fucking dog treats in my pocket on the way to the civil disobedience? As if I am not up shits creek enough living in fucking ALABAMA in this day and ageAAAUAUAUUAAAAGGGGHHHHHHH”
“Yes! Finally at the front of the lineAAAUAUUAAGAGAGGAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH”
“Yes! Finally at the front of the lineAAAUAUUAAGAGAGGAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH”
“….”
“….”
“OK. I just took off all my clothes, and am flirting like a motherfucker, and all these guys can do is talk shop about their stupid idea for a bicycle with a huge front wheel and a tiny back one? This is the absolute last time I try to hook up with bike messengersAAAUAUAUAAAGAGAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“OK. I just took off all my clothes, and am flirting like a motherfucker, and all these guys can do is talk shop about their stupid idea for a bicycle with a huge front wheel and a tiny back one? This is the absolute last time I try to hook up with bike messengersAAAUAUAUAAAGAGAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“God, finally the shade hits us. All these petticoats and overcoats and shit are cooking me like a game hen. I can actually relax now and have me a nice park sitAAAAUAUAUAAAGAGAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“God, finally the shade hits us. All these petticoats and overcoats and shit are cooking me like a game hen. I can actually relax now and have me a nice park sitAAAAUAUAUAAAGAGAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“Okay Christina. You can do this. To the house its only another…. fuck. That’s like two football fields. Why do I measure everything in football fields? That so stupidAAUAUAAAUAUAUAAAGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”
“Okay Christina. You can do this. To the house its only another…. fuck. That’s like two football fields. Why do I measure everything in football fields? That so stupidAAUAUAAAUAUAUAAAGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”



Share/Bookmark

No comments:

Post a Comment